PinCushion
Recently Joined
Hey everyone 😁
I'm new here but I've been using retatrutide for a little over a month now and I've seen some results I'm thoroughly impressed with.
I've had some pretty severe body image issues ever since I was a small child and I've never been happy with my appearance no matter what steps I've taken over the years.
No matter what I've done, whether it was basically living in the gym, trying endless types of diets and tracking calories to the point I had spreadsheets comparing the difference in calories and macros in everything, the weirdest example was likely 10g of cucumber both with AND without the skin on, so I could make super sure I was controlling my caloric intake, nothing seemed to stick and nothing seemed to make any of it any better.
I eventually hit a point where I'd completely given up and became a long-time recluse, and when trying to get back out and about in the world, ended up developing a number of serious substance misuse issues to cope with the anxiety, most of which stems from my body image issues 😅
To help explain why this site and it's resources mean so much to me, I wanted to explain a bit of backstory, though apologies in advance for the potential trauma-dump, the body image issues almost certainly from being raised by a single mother with untreated mental health issues, that had no one else to vent to besides her only child.
For as long as I can remember, it was an almost daily occurrence for my mother to break down in tears and cry/complain to me, at length, that she was fat and no one would ever love her because she was fat... and it meant that she was never good enough for anyone or anything.
She'd have relationships and it'd get better for a little while but before long, it'd all come crashing down and we'd be right back to the frequent ritual of "I'll never be happy because I'm fat and ugly and no one will love me".
The only way she knew to calm herself down and regain composure would, rather ironically, be to eat her feelings away.
As an adult now myself, logically, I can see this was just the behaviour of a woman who was trying her best but struggling with life, with her own body image, and with raising a son on her own whilst trying to hold down a job and manage finances without any kind of support network.
However, as a child, these repeat experiences affected the development of my worldview and my view of myself. I can safely say I've never, not even once, felt comfortable in my own skin, I cannot help but pick faults and feel disgusted with certain parts of my body whenever I unfortunately catch a glimpse of them in a mirror, whether clothed or not.
Thankfully, in my late teens/early twenties, my mother sought treatment and has been doing an awful lot better since, however, I've not reached a point where I'm doing much better just yet.
Admittedly, I'm no longer a recluse and besides retatrutide, TRT and a slight obsession with fruity vapes, I can say I'm drug free and have been for awhile, so I am doing better than I used to be, definitely. However, the body image issues are still there and though I doubt they'll ever truly be gone, each time I step on the scales (I've got one of those fancy-ish BIA scales which tracks fat vs muscle vs water etc), I feel better able to fight off that little voice in the back of my head that endlessly repeats all the things I used to hear my mother say, but about myself.
To the creator(s) of and contributors to this forum, thank you from the bottom of my heart for creating this wonderful site and giving people like me a place to figure out how to put our lives back together.
I'm new here but I've been using retatrutide for a little over a month now and I've seen some results I'm thoroughly impressed with.
I've had some pretty severe body image issues ever since I was a small child and I've never been happy with my appearance no matter what steps I've taken over the years.
No matter what I've done, whether it was basically living in the gym, trying endless types of diets and tracking calories to the point I had spreadsheets comparing the difference in calories and macros in everything, the weirdest example was likely 10g of cucumber both with AND without the skin on, so I could make super sure I was controlling my caloric intake, nothing seemed to stick and nothing seemed to make any of it any better.
I eventually hit a point where I'd completely given up and became a long-time recluse, and when trying to get back out and about in the world, ended up developing a number of serious substance misuse issues to cope with the anxiety, most of which stems from my body image issues 😅
To help explain why this site and it's resources mean so much to me, I wanted to explain a bit of backstory, though apologies in advance for the potential trauma-dump, the body image issues almost certainly from being raised by a single mother with untreated mental health issues, that had no one else to vent to besides her only child.
For as long as I can remember, it was an almost daily occurrence for my mother to break down in tears and cry/complain to me, at length, that she was fat and no one would ever love her because she was fat... and it meant that she was never good enough for anyone or anything.
She'd have relationships and it'd get better for a little while but before long, it'd all come crashing down and we'd be right back to the frequent ritual of "I'll never be happy because I'm fat and ugly and no one will love me".
The only way she knew to calm herself down and regain composure would, rather ironically, be to eat her feelings away.
As an adult now myself, logically, I can see this was just the behaviour of a woman who was trying her best but struggling with life, with her own body image, and with raising a son on her own whilst trying to hold down a job and manage finances without any kind of support network.
However, as a child, these repeat experiences affected the development of my worldview and my view of myself. I can safely say I've never, not even once, felt comfortable in my own skin, I cannot help but pick faults and feel disgusted with certain parts of my body whenever I unfortunately catch a glimpse of them in a mirror, whether clothed or not.
Thankfully, in my late teens/early twenties, my mother sought treatment and has been doing an awful lot better since, however, I've not reached a point where I'm doing much better just yet.
Admittedly, I'm no longer a recluse and besides retatrutide, TRT and a slight obsession with fruity vapes, I can say I'm drug free and have been for awhile, so I am doing better than I used to be, definitely. However, the body image issues are still there and though I doubt they'll ever truly be gone, each time I step on the scales (I've got one of those fancy-ish BIA scales which tracks fat vs muscle vs water etc), I feel better able to fight off that little voice in the back of my head that endlessly repeats all the things I used to hear my mother say, but about myself.
To the creator(s) of and contributors to this forum, thank you from the bottom of my heart for creating this wonderful site and giving people like me a place to figure out how to put our lives back together.
