In college, my friend Tex decided to lay off the steroids and later had a breast reduction for exactly this reason. He was fabulously jacked, and also had himself a pair of big, round, beautiful tits, which the tight t-shirts he favored did absolutely nothing to apologize for or even downplay. I have such a clear memory of lying on my friend Lynn's floor, looking up at her Christmas lights, high as balls, and musing out loud "If I wanted to feel up Tex's tits, would that be a straight thing or a gay thing?" (yes, I am aware that in this enlightened time, it would be obviously a straight thing but this was twenty-five years ago and there was no social media, so we hadn't really thought it all the way through in an everybody-knows way yet). My first husband saying "Wait, I have concerns here" and Lynn saying "Shhhh, lets figure this out."
